‘The words I never heard’ is a project that stems from my own upbringing in a home fuelled with domestic violence. It is part of an effort to change the narrative, break the cycle and not perpetuate harm. It is an authentic visual narrative of my three daughters. It represents love, support, encouragement and validation. It invites the viewer to consider the multifaceted nature in family relationships, where love and conflict coexist.

For the past 12 years I have been a single parent to my three daughters who are now in their teenage years. My own upbringing has influenced my approach to parenting and it has led me to reflect on my own teenage years. I experienced a lack of open communication and emotional expression growing up. It didn’t feel like a safe space to share my thoughts or show my feelings. This has shaped my own parenting style significantly. Breaking the cycle was hugely important to me. I was consciously aware of the harmful patterns and words that could be repeated with my own daughters and have used a positive approach to disciplining that is more supportive and can help prevent the transmission of trauma from one generation to the next.

Accompanying the photographic work is an illustrative narrative using the words I heard growing up alongside the words I never heard.